Sorry for the Yoda title above, but it is what it is.
Which is basically how I feel about most things right now.
I woke up at 6:45 this morning to get to a nail appointment at 8 AM. My fabulous nail expert, Jessie, fit me in to her busy schedule at her home studio and while she was working on my nails, we watched Bad Moms Christmas.
The opening scene of the movie basically sums up what Christmas is like for most moms (or whoever does most of the heavy emotional and invisible lifting in your household): stressful, harried, buying presents for everyone and their dog (literally - I bought a present for a dog that is not mine this year), decorating, doing all the traditional Xmas things, and trying to make sure everything is joyful and magical for all. Jessie and I both lamented, along with the main characters of the movie, about why this is and about how exhausting it all is. (Psst: we all know why, it’s the goddamn patriarchy.)
And yet, I guarantee you that I will do THE EXACT SAME THING next year.
Because MAGIC and JOY!
I passive-aggressively brought this up with my husband last week as we were out doing last minute gift shopping and when I complained about something or other (I can’t remember what) he made a comment about my white lady privilege. To which I replied that my white lady privilege is what affords him his “I don’t have to think about or do anything because you do it all” male privilege, and he promptly (and smartly) shut the heck up.
Earlier in the week, while I was buried in boxes and gift wrapping, he had made a similar comment about how gift-giving is my love language and how I LIKED doing it all, and the look on my face must have been VERY LOUD, because he then sat down and started helping me wrap everything. He’s learning.
Christmas has come and gone and it WAS magical and joyful. Now all I want is rest. At one point yesterday, everyone was out of the house except me and the dog and it was the sweetest 30 minutes of the past week. I laid on the couch and read my new book, and then the door opened and in came my people. I love them to bits, but oh, how I wanted just 30 more minutes of that blissful silence.
I was going to write something else here today, but this is what came out. I was also going to write a whole slew of posts before Christmas too—a gift guide for your peri/menopausal friends, a new “intro” post for all my new subscribers, and three more pitches and essays to other publications.
And then I didn’t.
I am trying so hard to not be so hard on myself for not doing all of the above. (My friend
from Unscripted: Screw the Should Life here on Substack, would for sure tell me to chill out and let go of that feeling—and of course she is right.)So yes, I did have many good writing intentions going into December, and then life/Christmas/hosting/magic/joy happened and my mind can only hold so much before I turn into a raging Grinch, so I had to submit and just accept that…
It is what it is, and it is good enough.
I hope magic and joy and REST was had at your house too, in whatever form that may be, and I am sending you all the best of wishes for the new year!
XOXO,
Natasha~
P.S. I am 2 subscribers away from my goal of getting to 100 of you, so if you could, please share HMFSB with a few friends or folks who you think would like it too. Thank you!
P.P.S. Look at my cute Capricorn Season nails! (It’s my birthday on January 1st.)
